Monday, October 1, 2012

One Week From Right Now...

...I will be getting ready to land in St. Thomas. My new life will be starting. I'll be 4000 miles away, completely on my own, and scared as sh*t. My entire life will be packed into 2 suitcases, a carry-on, and a backpack.


So yes, it's here. The time is very VERY quickly approaching for me to fly off to paradise and become an ex-pat. These past 6 weeks have been a blur, especially considering I've been waiting and planning for 18 months.

On August 27th, I talked on the phone with BVI Boss about where we were in the permit process and if we could set dates. She said not yet, but that we were close.

On August 28th, I got out of my hot yoga class and had a message from her. I sat in my car, sweaty and disgusting, and played the voicemail...then promptly burst into tears when I heard her say, "I have good news! Your permit has been approved!" Tears probably aren't the most accurate descriptor. Sobbing, bawling, "ugly crying" as my sister would say, would be a better term. Through the tears I called my mom, sister, and Jenni to let them know. IT WAS FINALLY HERE!

On August 29th, I purchased my airplane tickets. Sunday, October 7th at 9:40pm. BAM.

So since the end of August, my life has been madness. I've done a bajillion massages trying to get all of my beloved guests in one last time, worked a ton of hours, cleaned/organized every item I own, given away even MORE stuff, received my final paperwork and got my police records and health exam completed (I don't have syphilis, TB, or parasites in my poop. Yay!), sold my car (*tear*), had a minor freak-out over dog fostering which was then promptly squelched by awesome people in my life, partied with friends, visited people, driven up to my sister's place numerous times, and had more than one breakdown.

I found out in early August that I wouldn't be able to take Scully with me at first. This whole time I had planned on having my dog with me and had started working with the vet to get her ready, but my boss informed me that I couldn't have her in the temporary housing I'd be in for the first month. Besides, she said, it'd be much better for me to get there and get settled, then have someone bring her or get her when I went back to the States for a visit. Completely logical, but of course I started to stress. I knew my family couldn't take her. A friend then offered if I couldn't get anyone else...but then 2 weeks ago she realized she was having issues with care for her own dog while she was at work and said she might not be able to take Scully. I completely understood, but freaked out a little again.

Luckily a guest (and friend) of mine had offered to be a back up if something went wrong with the first person. So! Scully will be living with a wonderful family with 3 little boys and another little dog and she is going to LOVE it. I took her over there last week to meet everyone and it was perfect. The boys ran around and chased her and threw things for her and she had a blast. They promised to snuggle her and let her sleep with them. S & T, the mom and dad, are amazing people and I feel completely at ease about Sculls staying with them. S assured me that Scully can stay as long as I need. Considering that might be until I come home for Kate's wedding next August, I was/am completely floored by their kindness. The boys apparently keep asking about Scully and when she's coming to live with them. :) Scully will be going to her extended vacation on Thursday evening (so they can take her out of town to Leavenworth this weekend. Lucky dog! I've never even been!) and start to get her acclimated. I am going to miss my little girl SO MUCH, but I know this is the best and most responsible way to handle the situation. Once again, I have the most amazing people in my life. I'm so blessed!

One of the other most difficult things for me was saying goodbye to Solei. I had my last official shift last Sunday (minus a massage I did Thursday night that couldn't be rescheduled earlier), and it was painful. I wouldn't be where I'm at, I wouldn't be doing what I am, I wouldn't be the therapist I am, without that place. I know it's in good hands and my guests will be well taken care of, but I still have a very strong sense of responsibility and pride. That's been my home for the past 4 years. My rock. I've seen it grow from the ground up. I'm the last original team member. But, every baby bird has to leave the nest at some point. Time to fly on.

Which brings us to my last week here. I have SO MUCH TO DO, but it will get done. I have plans with friends this week, errands to run, crap to pack, and parties to attend. While I'd love to say I'm totally ready for everything, I'm not; I'm completely terrified. Full on freak out mode. But it's ok! It's all ok. The control freak in me is having a hard time with all the unknowns but I just need to trust and have faith and let it go. Everything will be fine.

I suppose I should shower and actually get my rear in gear...

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